Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Lola vs. You Had Me at Amanda Bynes

Part Deux of Australia will have to wait because I got distracted by a hot blond blogger, who just happens to be my It's Complicated Facebook lover. Although really the only thing that's complicated about our relationship is trying to figure out all the different ways in which I love her.

Yeah, that's right. It's V. I had just gotten back from Australia, was still hung over and dreadfully jet-lagged, but when she invited me to go to a charity benefit she was organizing, I didn't even pause when I shouted, "Yes! Yes! Yes!" So I grabbed a black lacy, skin tight dress- a dress that a guy once told me "made him want to sit up and beg"- and hopped on the next plane out of there. (Well, ok, maybe it was the next plane a week later but seriously guys why you gotta nitpick?)

The weekend started out with cake, wine, our pajamas, movies, a very satisfying three way (Thank you, Drew, of Welcome to the Clusterf*ck), and a confession of our mutual, secret adoration for Amanda Bynes in What A Girl Wants. I could have gone home satisfied and happy at this point. Seriously, how could it get any better than V, wine, and cake?

But things, my friend, were about to get even better. Because Saturday night, I mixed one part Faux Trixie, with one part V added a dose of pseudo celebrities and a retired NFL football player whose name I couldn't pronounce after a few too many rum and diet cokes , and garnished it with an 80's ski lodge party at a dive bar where I made out with someone's teenage crush.

Yes, I said 80's Ski Lodge Party. Wha-at?

And yes, I showed up amidst a sea of bright red ski patrol jackets, florescent green headbands, pink spandex pants, and checkered legwarmers dressed like the above. Did I mention the ice-pick heels? I swear the drunker I get, the better I am able to maneuver in them. Unless it's 1:30 am and I'm desperately trying to prop myself up against the cold, wet concrete side of the dive bar while getting hit on by a guy in triangle shaped sunglasses.

What amazes me is that this glorious weekend would never have happened if it hadn't been for writing a blog and getting to know people through theirs. Without which this conversation never would have taken place:

Lola: Hey there new friend! So, do you mind if I post about our antics and link to your blog tomorrow?

Faux Trixie: I would only expect that you would.

Lola: I may or may not refer to my tryst with _______.

FT: I think you need to.

Lola: 80's glasses and all.

FT: And red hoodie and ghetto tude. He loved you.

Lola: I think you mean my boobs.

FT: Everyone loves your boobs.

Lola: True, they, like have their own gravitational pull.

FT: And _____ started orbiting them. He's like your very own hoodrat satellite.

Lola: I love our newfound friendship already.

FT: Me too. I was commenting about it yesterday and today.

Lola: Ditto. And not in that lame Patrick Swayze in Ghost kind of way. In the real way.

Credit goes firmly into V's luscious court for introducing me to this fabulous chick. And for the amazing Star Burst bowl she made for me when we went to see True Grit the next day, hung over and bleary eyed. As much fun as the drunken mess that was Saturday night was, lazy day Sunday just might have topped it. Despite the cold, it really was one of those perfect days. Tinged with a lot of laughter, bookshop/wine cellar browsing, hung-over brunch, and the odd Ernest Borgnine tribute.

If I hadn't already adored the hell out of the girl, this weekend would have solidified it. Because when I needed her, she was there. And I'll never forget that. Well, just maybe some of the little things that occurred while mixing many different types of alcohol this past weekend but, hey, nobody's perfect.

Except maybe me.


Robal Johnson said...

Love it. Love you. Hope to see your gorgeousness real soon... x

Mr O said...

perfect ending haha. This story should be turned into a movie. I would watch it.

I can't wait until the day I pop up as a conversation.

Lola Lakely said...

@Robal- Back at ya babe. I just can't seem to stay in one place for very long these days. Maybe I should consider giving into my nomadic heritage and sell all my worldly possesions?

@Mr. O- It was a pretty perfect ending. If it did turn into a movie, it would probably have to be one in subtitles since you can't understand most of my dialogue from Saturday night. I blame vodka. And rum. And champagne. And wine.
And I'm sure you'll pop one day, luv. I'm sure.

*uncorked said...

What happened to my comment? I wrote one yesterday?! Ugh.

I love you and I miss you already. I kind of wish you would have decided to fly out on Tuesday, which of course, would not have happened because of the Snowlocaust.

If it gets turned into a movie, I would like casting veto power. That is all.

Anonymous said...

I wrote one yesterday too, and it was funny. It was all like, "YOU'RE AWESOME; CAN I COME TO JERSEY? BOOBS! FRIENDS!"

And now it's gone. Sigh. But yay to one of my new favorites!

Lola Lakely said...

@V- Wha-at? Why would it ever, ever delete your comment?

I had the exact same thoughts. I secretely wanted to get stuck in the snowlocaust with you too. We probably would have gained 10lbs by the time it was done. I miss us being fat together.

So who would you cast as us?

@The Faux Trixie- My response to your deleted comment would have been: "NO, YOU'RE AWESOME! YES! BOOBS and FRIENDS 4 EVA!"

And yay to us!

*uncorked said...

We would have needed more frosting. And I think we're hot enough to play ourselves, actually.

Roxanne and Lorraine said...

I followed the link on V's blog here and both accounts of the night seem like good, good times. And then you hit the comments and it's all fucking adorable. Look at you all with your boobs and friendship. It's beautiful


Lola Lakely said...

Roxanne and Lorraine- Look at you being all welcomy with your adorable comment too. Boobs and friendships are beautiful. Thanks for visiting! If you stay, there will be more boobs and more friendship.

blunt delivery said...

aw this sounds stupendous.. so jealous you met the FAUX! i live an hour away and i haven't met her yet that's bullshit. why am i a slave to my job?!?!?! eeeew.

miss you baby cakes,


tennysoneehemingway said...

Ah Lola. And only now I find that you've been in OZ. Well, serves me right I suppose. Not that I could've shown you even as remotely a good time as you obviously had but still, maybe next time. Love ya.

Lola said...

i never understand one word

Lola Lakely said...

Dearest Blunt of my Heart,

Got to meet the Faux and make out with her childhood crush and everything. I'm horrible. I miss you too baby. Got your magazine in the mail and wept at how much I missed you.

Ever Yours. Every Mine. Every Thine,


Lola Lakely said...

Tenny- Oh! I would have loved to have visited. Sigh.

busana muslim said...

thanks for that great info